


If It's Love You Want From Me, Then Take It - Away

by Marittimo



Series: Love Is Never Asking Why [9]
Category: The Lost Boys (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Mentions of Vampire-typical violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:01:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24937225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marittimo/pseuds/Marittimo
Summary: But Dwayne wasn't the guy Michael had gotten to know. He was a monster.He couldn't be both.A killer couldn't be that same guy that was always afraid of overstepping Michael's boundaries, that same guy that had won him a teddy bear and called himbabyA killer wouldn't genuinely care for him.Right?
Relationships: Dwayne/Michael Emerson (Lost Boys)
Series: Love Is Never Asking Why [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1613833
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	If It's Love You Want From Me, Then Take It - Away

**Author's Note:**

> Mama wipe the blood off of my face  
> I can't see through it anymore  
> I need someone to talk to, and a new hiding place  
> I feel like I'm looking at heaven's door

**"Look away, Mike."**

Michael had obeyed, had felt compelled to, but oh how he'd wanted to keep looking. There was something in all that slaughter that had called out from him, lured him to come closer.  
Get a look, get a _taste_.

It sounded too much like what he'd felt right after punching Sam and, disgusted by himself, Michael had left.  
He had run away fast, those inhuman faces still flashing before his eyes, those haunting laughters still ringing in his ears.

And that look from Dwayne, apologetic, hurt, and worried... Michael had seen the pain in his eyes and tried to tell himself that maybe it meant that Dway still cared, maybe it hadn't all been a farce.  
After all, if he'd just been pretending why would he try to protect him from Marko?

But Dwayne wasn't the guy Michael had gotten to know. He was a _monster_.  
He couldn't be both.

A killer couldn't be that same guy that was always afraid of overstepping Michael's boundaries, that same guy that had won him a teddy bear and called him _baby_.

A killer wouldn't genuinely care for him.  
Right?

Lost in his thoughts, Michael had reached his bike only to realize he had no idea where to go.  
He couldn't go back home, wouldn't willingly lead those _monsters_ to his family.  
' _As if they didn't already know where I live.'_

But where else could he go?   
His mind wandered back to the hotel, the safe place where, for the past few weeks, he had shared his nights with the man he loved; but Michael knew he couldn't go back there just as he couldn't go back to carefree life he had led before tonight.

Bitter tears filled his eyes, not caused by fear, not only at least, but by regret for what he had lost.

_'Why must every good thing in my life turn so spectacularly wrong? Don't I deserve happiness?'_

Michael sat there leaning on his bike and broke down. He wept for his life, wept for his love.

~

That's how Dwayne found him, curled up with his back on his bike, desperate and scared.  
He still had no idea what to say, couldn't think, just wanted, _needed_ to be close to Michael and comfort him.   
Dwayne wanted to reach out and hold him, but thought against it. What if Michael was still too afraid of him right now?

So he knelt in the sand, next to him but far enough that they weren't touching. "Hey, baby." He said in the most gentle tone he could. "Can I hold you?"  
 _'Please, let me help you. I can make you feel better, just trust me!'_  
Michael turned around immediately at his voice, and Dwayne heard his heartbeat speed up.

Michael hesitated before answering, pondering on what he should do.  
 _'Please do!'_ He wanted to say. _'I need you to hold me, want to feel you.'_  
"Stay back!" He said instead, jerking away from Dwayne, as if he was afraid of his touch, as if he didn't long for it.

Dwayne looked down. It hurt, seeing Michael afraid of him and knowing there was nothing he could do to make him feel better.  
"I'm scared, Dway." Michael admitted, finally. "What's going on?"

Dwayne didn't know how to answer, if at all.  
He could lie again, he could compel him and Michael would forget. Whether it'd be just their latest encounter or Dwayne's complete existence, he could do it easily.  
"I'm a vampire." He admitted instead. Michael deserved the truth. "I'm sorry you had to find out this way."

Michael just looked at him, confused and torn.  
He refused to believe it. Vampires weren't _real_.  
They were stupid fictional things his brother liked to read about in his stupid fictional comics.

But when Michael turned to Dwayne, angry words of retort already in his mouth just waiting to be spilled out, he noticed again how Dwayne's eyes were glowing. How sharper and longer his teeth looked. Remembered how fast Dwayne had moved in front of him.

It was impossible, but it made sense.  
It would even explain what he had just witnessed.

Michael's mind went back to the scene he'd seen short before, the massacred bodies, the slashed throats, all that _blood_...  
Dwayne saw how the memory triggered Michael's bloodlust, awakening that part of him that Dwayne had contaminated, tainted, _ruined_.  
Michael's blue eyes turned to a pale yellow and Dwayne had to turn away, regretting dragging him into this.

Michael started sobbing as tears ran down his face, and Dwayne turned to him again, holding out a hand but still not touching Michael, no matter how much he wanted to.

"Baby... Please don't cry." Dwayne wanted to reach out and wipe away his tears, hold him in his arms and tell him everything was gonna be alright. He was there to protect him, after all.

"Is there anything I can do?" He asked, his voice shaking. _'You know I'd do anything for you, you just have to ask.'_

Pain and disappointment were plain on Michael's face as he looked up.  
 _'I need you to hug me and kiss the fear away. I know you can make me feel safe again. I need you.'_  
"Leave me alone."

If Dwayne still had a beating heart, that sentence alone would have broken it, shattered it into a million pieces.

"I mean it, Dway. If anything of what happened between us meant something to you, if even just one word was true, then don't come after me, don't come after my family."  
Then, under his breath he added. "Don't hurt me more than you already did."

Dwayne nodded, fighting the urge to get closer to Michael and hold him tight until all his sadness went away, kiss him softly and promise him he still could trust him. Swear everything had been true, all that he had said.  
Instead, Dwayne forced back tears and spoke tenderly, reaching out to Michael in words and not touches.

"I could never hurt you, baby. And I meant every word! You know me, I-"  
"I know nothing about you!" Michael replied, accusingly. "I don't know who you are, what you are!"

_'I don't even know if you love me anymore, I don't know if you ever did...'_

Dwayne sighed, defeated. " _Doubt thou the stars are fire. Doubt that the sun doth move. Doubt truth to be a liar. But never doubt I love._ " He quoted under his breath. He knew Michael had heard him, he was a half now after all, his senses had been heightened, but Michael didn't react and the silence grew louder between them.  
"I'll go now." Michael said after a while, knowing he needed some time alone to clear his mind and think this through. 

"You don't have to." Dwayne exclaimed, dreading seeing Michael go. "Stay, please! Stay the night."

Here they were. The words Michael had longed to hear just hours ago.  
Dwayne's last desperate try to make it up to Michael and show him how much he still wanted him.

"Was this the reason why I never could?" Michael asked quietly, his voice betraying no emotion.  
"Of course! I've always wanted you to stay with me, but I was afraid you'd find out..." Dwayne looked down, ashamed. "I'll never push you away again, baby. Please, don't leave me..." His voice had grown thinner, weaker. 

Michael sighed.  
He was so tempted to accept, to throw himself into Dwayne's arms, even just to see all his sadness go away. It was unbearable to see his Dway so desperate, and they both could use some comfort now.

Instead, Michael flinched and turned away.  
He had seen what that facade covered, knew what that beautiful face could shift into.

"I can't do this, Dway...ne." His full name sounded wrong on Michael's lips, but Michael felt like he couldn't call him anything else. This wasn't his Dway anymore, Michael had to accept it.  
"Please, just let me go." He begged.

Dwayne closed his eyes in an attempt to fight back tears, but nodded. He understood the need to be alone more than most and understood that was what Michael needed now.  
It didn't make it any easier.

"But you'll come back, right?" He asked hopeful, but dreading the answer.   
"I- I can't promise you that." Michael answered honestly, even if the thought of it hurt.  
"I don't think I can live without you..." Dwayne admitted. He knew he must have sounded desperate, but he just couldn't picture ever being without Michael.  
 _'I don't think I can either.'_ Michael thought, but stood by his decision.

He stepped up tentatively, as if unsure if Dwayne would really let him go.  
He cautiously got on his bike, then looked back down at Dwayne, still on his knees on the sand.

What he was crying weren't tears, Michael realized. It looked scarily close to blood, and that gave Michael the strength to turn around and ride away.  
Dwayne watched him leave, then fell on his back, bitter bloody tears still falling from his eyes.

As he looked up and saw the sky getting paler he realized he didn't care.  
He would have gladly let the Sun take him.

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from Culture Club's 'Do You Really Want To Hurt Me'  
> In the notes at the beginning are the alternative lyrics to Bob Dylan's 'Knockin'On Heaven's Door' (Live at Harvard Square Theatre, 1975)  
> Dwayne quotes Shakespeare's 'Hamlet'


End file.
